No one ever said life was easy, regardless of financial well being, social status, or level of belief in religion. We all have things that happen daily that impact us and more importantly impact the one’s we love and care about the most. As daily issues arrive, many times the thing that gets impacted the most is your relationship with your significant other. These situational issues can put pressure on you and your partner which sometimes can lead to doubt and uncertainty as to whether your partner is there for you, whether they understand you, or if they even care at all.

There are a number of things that can help you prepare and get through these types of issues. The main thing is communication early and often. By nature we all have the following six human needs that need to be met for us to be truely happy they are as follows:

1. Certainty/Comfort. We all want comfort. And much of this comfort comes from certainty. Of course there is no ABSOLUTE certainty, but we want certainty the car will start, the water will flow from the tap when we turn it on and the currency we use will hold its value. – Do you know what your partner is looking for to feel certain, are you articulating to your partner what you need to be certain?

2. Variety. At the same time we want certainty, we also crave variety. Paradoxically, there needs to be enough UNcertainty to provide spice and adventure in our lives. – Is there enough variety to keep your partner happy, if not, what have you done to change that? Have you articulated to your partner what you need to be happy in this area.

3. Significance. Deep down, we all want to be important. We want our life to have meaning and significance. I can imagine no worse a death than to think my life didn’t matter. – Do you make your partner feel significant? Are there things that you think your partner feels are more important you? Have you articulated to your partner what is making you feel un-significant? Sometimes things such as computers, newspapers, TV and other things can make your partner feel very un-significant. These are sometimes habits that can be changed with love, support and most importantly heart felt communication on the matter. Also something could be missing in the area of one of these other 6 areas of human needs that keep your partner focused on the distraction rather then yourself. Through communication you can understand and grow together in the right way.

4. Connection/Love. It would be hard to argue against the need for love. We want to feel part of a community. We want to be cared for and cared about. – One of the biggest issues that causes people to grow apart is this area. Every relationship needs dedicated time regularly to focus on each other, talk, be playful and most importantly connect. With work and kids many people lose this time. Couples sometimes feel the children need to come first, but through focus on you as a couple first you will have the love and happiness that will flow over into your relationship with your children. You will find with dedicated time for yourself and your relationship, many other things will fall into place easily.

5. Growth. There could be some people who say they don’t want to grow, but I think they’re simply fearful of doing so—or perhaps NOT doing so. To become better, to improve our skills, to stretch and excel may be more evident in some than others, but it’s there. – Are you growing as a person? Are you learning new things? Are you growing with your partner? If you’re not growing, your dying. More importantly try doing things and activities with your partner that will allow you to grow together. One example is perhaps getting involved in fitness together and not only growing together daily but increasing your health together to enjoy a long, happy and healthy life together.

6. Contribution. The desire to contribute something of value—to help others, to make the world a better place than we found it is in all of us. – Do you feel as if you are contributing? This is another area that can strengthen your relationship as well. By focusing on community activities or charities together can also help increase your level of happiness and the well being of your relationship.

These six human needs are a must in the psychology realm to be happy. Keep in mind if they are not being met we often we can also meet them in destructive ways that only provide short term bursts of happiness. If you are finding that you are unhappy one or more of these needs are not getting met. If you are not doing these for yourself and your partner is not meeting them either it can lead to unhappiness and the feeling of being lost and confused. Many times these can be overcome by talking with your partner about what has not been feeling good to you. But these conversations need to be based on trust and heart felt connection. Your partner and you need to trust that when you let your partner in it is because they want to make a difference and they care about you. Many people do not let this level of connection happen because of the fear that they can be hurt when someone is so deeply connected to them. Love without this type of connection though is superficial and on borrowed time.

We all want someone to come into our life’s that loves us so much that no matter what obstacles life throws at us they are going to be there and stand the course. No matter what we say or do your partner will still be standing there saying ” I am going to still love you forever”. After all our parents had that for us and and it keeps that relationship in tact for ever, the same principle applies to relationships. When there is unconditional love coming from both partners meeting the above 6 human needs, you will have a love that stands the course of time. If you have thoughts of ending a long term relationship, ensure you think trough the above needs and ask yourself have you truely had the level of communication necessary for successful relationship?

Live Life With Passion Not Regret..